Questions You Need to Ask in Couples Counselling Session

Questions You Need to Ask in Couples Counselling Session

So, you and your partner are getting ready for couples therapy. Great! Making a decision to start working on your relationship is a big step. Another challenge is trusting someone you don’t know to work through your problems. Here are important questions to ask your couples therapist to ensure that your first and all following sessions are effective. Your therapist’s goal is to guide you toward happiness in your relationship, but you need to know what specific techniques and approaches your couples counsellor will use in sessions.

Questions to Ask the Therapist
  1. How can we improve our communication with each other?

In relationship counselling, ask your therapist how you can communicate better. This question is important because good communication is key to a happy relationship. By talking with your therapist about this, you can learn new ways to communicate and listen to each other. In therapy, you get a chance to talk about what’s bothering you in a safe therapeutic environment. Couple therapists can give you ideas that work for you and your partner, so you can learn to understand each other better and fix issues.

  1. How can we handle arguments and disagreements better?

In couples therapy, it’s important to ask the right questions, especially about how to deal with arguments and disagreements. Arguments and disagreements are inevitable in any relationship. However, learning how to deal with them respectfully and finding solutions together strengthens the bond between partners. You might want to know how to handle fights more calmly or how to talk to each other without it turning into a big fight. You can ask your therapist for tips on listening better and understanding each other’s feelings during arguments. You might also want to know how to stop fights from happening so often and how to make up afterward. By asking these kinds of questions, you can work with your therapist to make things better in your relationship.

  1. Are there things we can do on our own outside of sessions to enhance our relationship?

Asking your therapist for tips on what you can do on your own shows that you’re serious about making things better. This willingness to put in effort is key to making progress. When you try out the advice or exercises your therapist suggests outside of therapy, it helps you bring what you learn in sessions into your everyday life. It’s more about practicing a new skill outside of session—it makes you better at it faster. So, if you’re learning better ways to talk to each other or solve problems, practicing those skills at home makes them stick, making your relationship stronger in the long run.

Questions to Ask from Your Partner
  1. How do you feel about us being in therapy together?

In couple therapy, asking your partner how they feel about being in therapy together is an important question for several reasons. It opens up a dialogue about the shared experience of therapy, allowing both partners to express their thoughts, concerns, and expectations openly. It also demonstrates empathy and validation towards your partner’s feelings. It acknowledges that therapy can evoke different emotions, such as empathy, hope, or relief, and shows a willingness to support each other through the process. This validation can strengthen the bond between you and your partner and create a safe space for honest communication.

Talking about how you feel about therapy can help reveal any hidden worries or confusions either of you might have. For example, one of you might be unsure about therapy because you’re concerned of being judged. The other might think it’s a good thing for getting better. Talking about these differences from the start can stop misunderstandings and make sure you both agree on what you want from therapy.

  1. How do you see our ideal relationship? What would it look and feel like?

It’s really important for partners in a relationship to know what each other hopes for in an ideal relationship. This helps you understand your partner better, get closer emotionally, and grow together. When you know what your partner dreams of, you can support each other better and appreciate your differences more. It also helps you plan for the future and tackle problems together. Understanding each other’s hopes makes it easier to build a relationship that makes both partners happy and fulfilled.

  1. What do you need from me in order to feel supported and understood?

In couples therapy, asking this question can lay down a solid foundation for better understanding and closeness between you and your partner. It’s about making sure both people feel heard and cared for in the relationship. This question is super important because it encourages partners to talk openly and honestly about what they need emotionally. By talking things out, couples can handle disagreements better and figure out how to meet each other’s needs. Plus, it helps partners see things from each other’s point of view and feel more connected.

When partners listen to each other and show they understand, it stops little issues from turning into big fights. Feeling supported and understood makes couples feel closer and more secure in their relationship. Also, asking this question helps both partners learn more about themselves and grow as individuals. By thinking about what they need and expressing it, they become more aware of their own feelings and behaviours. So, asking what your partner needs to feel supported and understood isn’t just a question—it’s a way to strengthen your bond.

Questions to Ask Yourself
  1. What role do I play in the conflicts or challenges we are facing as a couple?

This question isn’t about blaming yourself, but about being honest. You need to understand what you contribute to disconnect in your relationship. When you think about your actions and how they affect your relationship, it indicates that you’re willing to take responsibility. This builds trust and respect between you and your partner. Being honest with yourself also helps you grow as a person. You can learn from your mistakes and find better ways to handle disagreements. When you think about your role in conflicts, it also helps you understand your partner better. You become more aware of their feelings and perspective. This makes it easier to solve problems together and makes your bond stronger. So, asking yourself this question is a big step toward making your relationship better and closer.

  1. Am I willing to take responsibility for my actions and work towards solutions?

Asking yourself this question means being honest about the role you play in the relationship and being willing to make things better. It’s not always easy to admit when we’re wrong, but it’s a big step towards making things work with our partner. Taking responsibility means understanding that our actions affect our relationship and being willing to make changes for the better. When both people in a relationship are open to this, it helps build trust and makes it easier to talk about problems.

Working on solutions means actively trying to make things better. It’s not enough to just say sorry; you need to show that you’re committed to fixing things and making your relationship stronger. Couples therapy gives you a chance to learn how to communicate better and solve problems together. So, asking yourself if you’re ready to take responsibility and work on solutions is really asking if you’re willing to put in the effort to make your relationship work.

  1. Am I open to feedback and willing to make compromises for the betterment of our relationship?

Being open to feedback means you’re ready to hear what your therapist has to say and consider it seriously. It’s about keeping the conversation flowing smoothly. And being willing to compromise means you’re ready to give a little to find solutions, even if they’re outside your usual comfort zone. Asking yourself this question shows you’re committed to making things better between you and your therapist. By being open and flexible, you’re setting the stage for positive growth and change in your therapy journey.


Thrive Together with Expert Couples Therapy in Vancouver, Canada!

Are you and your partner having a tough time in your relationship? Don’t let problems like not talking well or not sorting out issues make things harder. Our special relationship counselling in Vancouver can help you work through these problems and make your bond stronger.

At Modern Therapy, we know every relationship is different. That’s why we offer counselling that’s just for you and your partner. Our therapists are really good at creating a safe space where you can talk about what’s bothering you and learn how to talk better together.

Whether you’re fighting a lot, having trust issues, feel distant from your partner, or just want to get things to be better and smoother, our couples therapy in Vancouver can help you figure things out and make your relationship stronger.

Other Benefits of Relationship Counselling | Modern Therapy Clinic
Other Benefits of Relationship Counselling | Modern Therapy Clinic
Why Pick Us?
  • Our therapists are experts in helping couples.
  • We make sure our therapy fits your needs and goals.
  • We keep everything you say private.
  • Our office is easy to get to in Vancouver.

Ready to make your relationship healthier and happier? Get in touch today to set up your couples therapy session in Vancouver and start working towards a closer and happier future together.

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